As wedding traditions and celebrations have evolved over time and throughout cultures, one of the most beautiful trends has become writing your own vows. Original, personalized wedding vows are a special way to tell your partner how much they mean to you and dedicate yourself to a life with them in front of your loved ones!
Writing your own vows can be intimidating if you don’t know where to start. Fortunately, there are a lot of resources to help you express your love and devotion in the best way possible. Along with your experienced and knowledgeable officiant, you can use this comprehensive guide as your go-to resource when it comes time to put pen to paper!
Use traditional vows as a template.
If you find yourself staring at a blank piece of paper for too long, turn to classic vows and popular wedding passages for inspiration. Highlight poems or phrases you might want to incorporate in your own vows. Or, pull out the concepts and sentiments you connect with the most and put your own twist on them. Once you have a blueprint to build on, it’ll be easier to figure out what you want to say next.
Write down your thoughts and answers to some basic questions.
Why do you want to get married? How/when did you know your fiancé was the one? What does marriage mean to you? Brainstorm a list or find one online of questions that make you think. Writing out your answers will help you get in tune with yourself mentally and emotionally so you can sort out what it is you want to say.
Don’t be afraid to be open and vulnerable with yourself as you record your thoughts. Use your answers to guide your vows so your words sound and feel natural and genuine.
Make it personal.
The great thing about writing your own vows is that you can infuse them with anecdotes and memories about you and your partner that reflect your relationship! Revisit the highs and lows that have led you to this moment. Keep in mind though that you don’t want to be reciting a novel at the ceremony—keep it short and sweet.
Be authentic.
The whole point of skipping traditional vows is to exchange words that are more specific to you and your relationship. Don’t try to write something that isn’t you just because it sounds good. Relationships aren’t always a fairytale—it’s okay to acknowledge that in your vows. They will be more meaningful if you do!
Make your words feel real in admitting that relationships take work and yours is no exception. Recognize that marriage is going to be a lifetime of effort that you’re willing to make for that person. Include unique promises to your partner that will resonate more powerfully with you and those who know your relationship.
Start early and practice.
Waiting until the last minute to start your vows is a recipe for disaster. Give yourself time to do several drafts and practice getting comfortable with the final product. The more time you have, the less pressure you’ll feel to get them done, and the better they’ll turn out!
Practice reading your vows aloud—you can even memorize them if you want. Read them to a close friend, family member, or your officiant to get advice and get used to sharing them.
When you plan your wedding ceremony with the experts at Casual Elegance, we’ll help you take what’s in your heart and put it into words for your partner, friends, and family to witness together! We have plenty of experience with all different vow and ceremony styles that we’ll use to help you choose or craft the perfect message.
Give us a call to learn more about the comprehensive services we provide to turn your dream wedding into a reality!
